The Ultimate Guide To Talking Dirty With Awesome Tips And Strategies

Talking Dirty GuideAny couple will admit that it can be difficult to keep a relationship fresh, fun and sexy. There are many ways to achieve this, some of which go into taboo areas that not all couples are comfortable with.

However, people need to know that the stigma associated with things like fetish, role-play and dirty talk is gone, so there is no reason not to do things that increase happiness and make the sex life better.

The Purpose

Naughty talk is one way couples can keep their relationship fresh, increase communication and make their sex lives a whole lot more fun.

The first thing you should know is that there is no reason to be embarrassed or ashamed for wanting to engage in some naughty conversation. Not everyone would admit it, but many if not most couples do this stuff from time to time.

Even the straight laced neighbor that gets red faced talking about sex probably does it, so there is no reason to feel like you are doing something wrong or immoral. Sexy discussion between consenting adults is perfectly normal and is not an indication of sexual deviance or perversion.

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People engage in all types of sexy talking, so there is really no right or wrong way to do it. One of the biggest reasons partners start to talk sexy in the first place is that they find it is a great way to communicate. Some sometimes find it difficult to tell their partner exactly what they want, or what things excite or turn them on.  Spicy discussion can be a great way for couples to communicate their desires so that the other person knows how to satisfy them.

This type of communication is crucial for couples that want to have an enjoyable and satisfying love life, so people should not be afraid to tell their partner exactly what they want, even if they have to talk sexy to do it. Usually the other partner will be happy to hear it, as it will give them some guidance for how to make the sex more pleasurable.

Awesome Tips And Strategies For Ya Dear Visitor

Some engage in discussion that is more of the fetish variety. This could include things like S & M or other types of power games. Some like to be yelled at or insulted during sex, or even ordered around and commanded what to do. Obviously this type of discussion is not for everyone, but many couples enjoy being bossed around or even talked to in a mean and aggressive manner. This is a type of naughty conversation that partners should probably discuss beforehand, as it likely will not work out if one partner enjoys a type of extreme dirty talk that offends or shocks the other.

In addition, there are people that take part in various different kinds of role-playing that involves this type of conversation. This could be anything from dressing up in costumes, acting out different parts, or even pretending to be strangers that meet in public. This type of discussion allows some to step out of their normal role and do something completely different, which can be a big turn on. Lovers that are passive in their normal lives might want to act out a dominant, more vocal role than normal, while those that are dominant may want to adopt a more meek personality. It can be especially exciting for couples to meet in public to have a naughty and spicy discussion.

Show Me An Example, Sir!!!

For example, a couple might meet a bar, one pretending to be a prostitute, the other her customer. This type of role-playing allows people to let their guard down and really say the things that get them excited.  They can say things to their wife, husband or partner that they might not be able to in a normal situation.

In case this was not obvious, this activity is not just for men. Some couples wrongfully assume that men are the only ones that have spicy thoughts or enjoy this type of activity. Women have the right to be just as sexually adventurous and dirty as men, so there is no reason why they cannot take equal part in the discussion. The days of the passive woman that just lies there in bed while the husband does everything are over.

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Women are not only taking an active part in these activities, but are initiating them. Some old fashioned lovers might view this as a woman acting trashy, but in reality it is the sign of a strong woman that knows what she wants and how to get it. Modern men that are not threatened by strong women enjoy a female that will tell them what to do, what things they enjoy, and how to perform to make it happen.

It is okay to be fun and playful. Many think it has to be perverse and sinister, but this is not the case. Lovemaking is supposed to be fun, so adding some lively, playful talk to the sex life can help make things more enjoyable. However, it is definitely a good idea not to push the limits of the other person right away, if someone is not into this type of stuff it should not be forced upon them. In the end, if both partners are not into it, the situation is probably not going to work anyway. Couples should stick with partners that have similar interests and desires to ensure that both people are happy and comfortable with the situation.

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Some couples assume that this type of discussion is something that happens simply as a result of passion, but it can also serve a practical purpose. There are lovers who have a very difficult time enjoying sex. There could be physical or mental reasons for the problem, but there are those that find achieving climax to be very difficult. This is where dirty talk can really be a help to the relationship, as people can use it to give instructions to their partner.

Touch Me!!!

If there is a certain way they like to be touched, or they want to slow things down or speed things up they should communicate this to their partner. Some find this type of instruction to be a turn off, but most will appreciate their partner’s honesty and will have no problem following instructions that will make the act more enjoyable. People that are quiet and do not tell their partner how to help them enjoy sex could doom themselves to a lifetime of boring and unenjoyable sex that could be avoided with some instructive signals.

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This activity can also be used to surprise someone, or to build up sexual tension that will eventually lead to satisfying sex. One way to do this is to surprise the partner with an unexpected phone call or text during the day. This is a great technique because it lets the other person know they are being thought of, which can be a big turn on. Sending a dirty message during the day can also build up sexual anticipation so the two people excited and turned on when they finally meet each other.

This is especially important for couples that have been together for a long time. Once the initial magic has worn off, couples need to take an active role in keeping things fresh and sexy. This type of anticipation is a great way to ensure that couples look forward to seeing each other at the end of the day. However, it is important that these types of messages be delivered appropriately and discreetly.

A person will not likely appreciate such message if it was delivered in front of their boss or coworkers. For this reason it is best to avoid speaker phones and other delivery methods that might get the person in trouble at work.

When it comes to examples of sex talk many are really only limited by their own creativity and the comfort level of their partner. The most simple kind is people just confirming when things feel good, or telling their partner to go faster, slow down, or where to move. Of course, there are people that will want to take things much further and there is nothing wrong with that. It is probably best to feel the other person out a bit first so that they are not shocked, appalled or even scared by it. Couples should try to stay within a level that is comfortable for the other person while still pushing the boundaries.

If “yes, do it faster” is as dirty as one person wants to get, their partner should respect that and try to not go too far. Some have a much higher tolerance for the conversation and prefer graphic, even profane talk during sex. Again, people are really only limited by their own imagination and turn ons, so they should do whatever they and their partner find enjoyable, as long as it is safe and consensual.

Couples should also realize that it is not just about words and phrases. Feelings can also be expressed through a variety of sounds. After all, many times it is not what is being said that matters, but how it is being said.

Moaning, groaning, sighs and sensual whispering are all forms of sexy talk that you can use to help your partner know what things are turning them on. This can be as simple as a sexy sigh, or go as far as full blown screaming, yelling and crying out that might wake the neighbors. Remember, it does not always take words, some do it with noises and body language.

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Are You Being Comfortable?

Couples should try to engage in dirty talking that comes naturally to them and does not force the issue. If the person is not comfortable saying certain words or phrases then they should not be forced to do so. Most of the time it will be obvious when someone is not comfortable or is saying things that are really not natural to them. One person might want their partner to be mean and harsh, which is something some people do not enjoy. Couples should stick to the things that come naturally to them and stay within their comfort zone when it comes to action.

It is also vital to remember to set boundaries between real life and what goes on in the bedroom. Just because someone likes being called a “bitch” or “whore” during the act does not mean that it is appropriate to do it all of the time. Things that happen in the bedroom should stay there and couples should respect the boundaries that are drawn by their partner. Also, if there are certain words or things one person is not comfortable with, the other person should respect that and avoid those words. This is still a form of communication, so you need to be open about it.

Those that are having a hard time coming up with things can look at some examples, but be warned, they are not for the squeamish. Couples can say things like: “Don’t stop, I love it right there,” “I’m going to show you who is boss,” “Take it all” “I want your sexy ass” and a million other variations. As stated before, people should say the things that come naturally to them and not try to force words that are outside of their personality or comfort zone.

When it comes to talking sexy, you should know that it is perfectly normal and not something that you should be ashamed of. Also, people that are more vocal and communicative during sex are more likely to have fun and satisfying love lifes where both people are getting the things they need. Men and women alike can use naughty talking as a way to express themselves, their sexual desires and to add a lot of excitement to relationships that might be getting stale.

Further Reading and Resources That You Will Love


    I have always been the type to never talk dirty to a woman. I’ve been with a few women, and I never figured out if they would have liked it or not. I’m sure a couple of them would have liked it, but I just don’t know for sure if they would have cared. I will certainly try this with my current girlfriend though, the idea of talking dirty sounds really fun to me now even more. 😀

  • MeganZ.

    To all the guys out there, women love it when you talk dirty to them. I love being talked to in a dirty way, especially during sex, it heightens the emotion I think. It’s even better when you are roleplaying, kind of creates a fantasy in some ways.

    I think talking dirty is natural, I want it because it’s fun, and my boyfriend doesn’t mean anything he says, he just wants to sound dirty. I think more guys should try it.

  • TomBCool

    Talking dirty is do fantastic. I prefer it more when a woman talks dirty, stares me in the eye and just goes crazy. Turns me on big time. I’m not great at talking dirty though, so maybe this can be of some help to me. I need as much practice as I can get, haha! I suck at talking dirty, I just come off as lame. Good thing my girlfriend loves my horrible dirty talk anyways. lol

  • Catherine Bigelow

    There are a lot of different ways to go about talking dirty. Some women do not like it when you’re too harsh, or too scary when you talk dirty, some just like casual dirty talk while some women want you to go all out and talk as dirty as possible.

    I am the type of woman who just wants the simple dirty talk, I don’t like harsh or offensive, which some men do when they talk dirty. You also need to know when to stop.

  • Cass

    Not a big fan of talking dirty to women. I guess you could say I prefer when a woman talks dirty to me. I never was any good at it. If anything I’m laughably bad when it comes to talking dirty. I will utilize what I have learned from this article and when I have sexy sex time next, I will for sure remember this article. Thanks!